I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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