I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
wakey wakey hands off snakey
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
