Your face is a jimmy john
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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