the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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