So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
