Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize