O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
