This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
