Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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