And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
operation have a gay friend backfired
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
