I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
