Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
