Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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