i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
