Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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