I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
