Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
