she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
