I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
