Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
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