You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
