somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
