i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
