So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
