I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
