I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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