Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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