If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
