some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Randomize