I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
