You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
