this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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