What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize