Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
