I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
they need to just BURY HIM!
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Randomize
