She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
