Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
