Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Randomize
