i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
ttyl tear gas
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
