Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
