its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
