Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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