I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize