Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
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