Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
