Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
