Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
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