The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
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