Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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