dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
