did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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